Pet peeves

I’m having a bad day and I sit there quietly counting the 480 minutes left in my shift. It’s not fair to my players to take it out on them so I try and smile and suck it up. Maybe strike up a conversation with a regular about their day. Sometimes I like to start a conversation with someone who looks down or doesn’t talk much. I tend to find out that some of these people have interesting lives or jobs. Everyone has bad days and things tend to get on your nerves more than others. Here are some of my pet peeves that I am immune to most days, but for those days when the world sucks it drives me nuts.
1. Players moving the button. Honestly I don’t mind someone moving the button, as long as you tell me or say something and wait till the hand is over. Usually someone moves it and out of extreme habit I move it again. The player says “I already moved it”. Well how the hell am I supposed to know that.
2. Yelling out exposed cards. Someone sees a flash of a hand that someone mucks, I immediately throw it in the muck. They say I saw that card, what card? A 10 or 9 or 8 possibly black? Ok first of all the hand is in the muck, I’m not going to fish it out. Second 80% of the time people are wrong about what they saw(if I haven’t mucked the hand and then show everyone because they thought they saw it). I know we are all trying to be honest and whatnot but if you are given information why share it? Use it, even though you’re probably wrong about what you saw.
3. Stack and splash. I’ve mentioned this one before, when someone carefully counts out an amount in their work area and then splashes out on the felt. Seriously? If it’s a bet, someone is gonna ask how much. I have to count it. Which involves stacking up that mess and carefully counting it out like you just did. If it’s a raise I have to be able to tell it’s a legal raise, and someone is going to ask how much. So I have to count it. Still can’t take your word for how much it is. If it’s a call this is the worst time to do that because I HAVE to count it anyways.
4. “Antes please”. I can understand the first couple of rounds. Level 13 and you still can’t put your blinds out? I’m not talking about the guy talking to the waitress or answering a text. Every single hand. Aren’t you here to play poker? Honestly it’s not that big of a deal to me but I can’t start the hand until I have all the antes. If you want more play and more hands at smaller levels, the faster everyone gets their blinds in, the faster I can fire the hand off.
5. One seat obstruction. I love to fire off the cards and get the game moving. If you’re sitting in the 1 seat don’t stack your chips in a line extending straight out to the middle or put your hands, arms, elbows or body on the felt. In order to deal properly I shouldn’t have to reach my arms all the way out and turn my wrists just to give the 2 seat their cards. Some places don’t allow hands (or body parts) on the table before all the cards are dealt out, why can’t I find these places? Anyways the reason you should be aware of it is it slows the game down as I have to extend 40 times( 20 hands x 2 cards) during that half hour. Not to mention exposed cards because I keep hitting your damn stack or your hands as you lay on the table like a gorilla.
Ok rant over, whew I feel better. Comments welcome and appreciated.

12 thoughts on “Pet peeves

  • April 6, 2014 at 4:04 pm
    Permalink

    I can’t stand when a players goes all in or makes a large bet/raise and without asking, the player next to him/her, who is not even in the hand, feels the need to volunteer how much the bet is. This is so wrong, especially when it’s a multi way pot and the volunteer is usually wrong. If your not in the hand, stay out of it and let the dealer answer pot questions.
    Also, in a multi way pot with action ahead of you, such as a raise, and players still to act behind you, don’t get up from the table and leave or fold out of position. Have some respect and wait your turn to fold. It may effect the other players in the hand and their strategy. It’s just plain rude.

    Reply
    • April 6, 2014 at 9:07 pm
      Permalink

      Agreed, when most players try to be “helpful” it’s out of line and usually wrong

      Reply
  • April 7, 2014 at 6:47 pm
    Permalink

    Great post and I will definitely keep those in mind as a player (although I don’t think I do any of those.) I have never understood the stack and splash move. I do play with a couple of dealers who sometimes do need help with the button, but if I (or someone else) moves it I make sure they are told.

    Reply
  • April 8, 2014 at 4:18 am
    Permalink

    Antes please ! This is my pet peeve, but goes further than just antes. The amount of people I have witnessed who seem to think they have a right not to even supply blinds in tournies and cash games just blows my mind. And when asked to, they then give “the look” and they push chips up to and half across and not fully across the line, like they have scored a point. This may be small beans to some, but really boils my blood. Not only is it lazy, it’s disrespectful to the dealer and the game. If you don’t want to participate within the rules, go play blackjack, but hey, they wants chips too !

    Reply
  • April 8, 2014 at 4:28 pm
    Permalink

    i hate the player that always moves to the empty seat. there should b a cap on how many times to can move from seat 3 to seat 7 to etc,etc.

    Reply
    • April 9, 2014 at 12:46 am
      Permalink

      Yeah the guy that thinks changing something irrelevant to cards will help his luck. Seat change, table change, set up, dealer change(I love that one). I always tell them to take their change out of one pocket and put it in the other. Usually get strange looks.

      Reply
  • April 15, 2014 at 2:20 pm
    Permalink

    Your posts are not only humorous and entertaining, but informational. Some of this seems like it should be common sense, but maybe not so ‘common’.

    Reply
    • April 15, 2014 at 3:21 pm
      Permalink

      What’s funny is some of these players that I make fun of really don’t see themselves how we see them. And even if you told them I’m almost positive it wouldn’t change the way they act.

      Reply
  • April 25, 2014 at 6:39 am
    Permalink

    id like to have u at my table if ur dealing 20 hands every 30min which i think is impossible

    Reply
    • April 25, 2014 at 7:51 am
      Permalink

      Depends on if it’s a limit game or no limit game, how fast the players are, how long they “tank”. The key is gently guiding the action and doing all the other things quickly (shuffle, deal etc)

      Reply
  • July 21, 2016 at 8:06 pm
    Permalink

    I run a poker room and evaluate my dealers regularly. A large part of their eval is on hands/down. 70% of my dealers average 19-20. The dealers bid for shifts based on eval scores, so they are incentivized to keep the game moving. It tilts me to no end when I play in other rooms where dealers get out 14 hands/down because a. They aren’t paying attention to where the action is or b. Aren’t prompting players who don’t know the action is on them.
    Also, our waitresses are instructed to take orders in between hands so that the game doesn’t grind to a halt every 20 minutes.
    Everyone wins when the game moves quicker: the good players see more hands per hour, increasing their hourly win rate. The bad players who are there to gamble have more hands to gamble on and don’t get bored. The dealer has more opportunities to get tipped. The house has more hands to rake, allowing us to spend more money on the players (high Def tvs, higher comps, rake back, free rolls and other promos).

    Reply

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: