Cards Speak

You’ve heard it before, “Cards Speak” or “Cards Read” meaning that no matter what someone calls out, what they have showing for a hand is what plays. From the joking “I’ve got 2 small pair, 4s and 4s” when they have quad 4s. To someone that says straight when they have a flush or straight flush, actually not knowing that they hit the other draw. Every once in awhile you get a dick that says it on purpose basically slow rolling his true hand, but most of the time its just someone not paying that close attention to the suits since they noticed the straight first. Quite a bit a player will call out a set not knowing the board paired and they have a full house.

In my many years I’ve actually had people try and argue with me that someone called out the wrong hand so they are entitled to the pot because they can beat the called out hand, but not the actual hand tabled. It just brings me to believe that they were hustled at their home game over and over by their friends. Kind of like when I learned cribbage and my opponent took all the points I missed, hard knocks lessons. To my knowledge no card room or casino in the world has different rules than “cards speak”.

A couple times this week, as I prepared for this article, I noticed a couple other times where “cards speak” but not in the way I talked about previously. Young kid is playing a 2/4 limit game and rolls over 2 Kings on a Q 10 7 10 2 board. The other guy flopped 2 pair Q 7 and got counterfeited  with the bigger 2 pair. The kids starts bragging about how he played that great and thats why he won. The next hand he wins after rivering a draw and again goes into how he was “floating” the gut shot on the flop hoping for a “combo draw”. A few hands later he plays a 10 2 on the button and when he rivers a 10 for 2 pair, he goes on about how he heard so much about this “Doyle” hand and had to play it. This just got me thinking that first, everyone else at the table has an average age of 60 and they really don’t care to hear you blab about poker terms you heard while watching this years WSOP final table. With this new found knowledge you would think that you might play better? Either way, the way you play your cards “speak” about how you play and all the banter isn’t really necessary.

Your typical hothead goes off on another guy about playing a hand, when he is really just mad because the guy made his hand and beat him. He flips over a flush while the hothead had an over pair. He freaks out about how this guy is a fish and wants him to keep playing that way. He had an open ended straight flush draw on the flop, who wouldn’t “chase” this? Of course he is just venting because he is a big crybaby. In this instance the guy who wins just quietly stacks his chips and the cards SHOULD speak here to the hot head that it was basically a coin flip on the flop and it wasn’t like a miracle one outer got him. The alternative to this is the hot head meets someone that has had enough of the guys mouth and lets him know how much of a cry baby he is and then I have to prevent a fight or a big argument.

The last example is Mr. Obvious. Every single time he plays a hand he has to explain his play. I had to call with my aces because the pot was so big. I had to chase my flush draw because the pot odds were right. I had you on nothing because of the hand you bluffed me on 3 years ago so I had to call you with ace high. When you flip the cards over anyone who actually cares how the hand was played can see in about 2 seconds what the board was and what your hand was. No one cares about your explanation. We can also surmise if you played it by the book or if you chased like a donkey because the “cards speak” so shhhhh.

Brought to you by Your Poker Dealer

4 thoughts on “Cards Speak

  • November 16, 2014 at 1:43 am
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    I also wish more people were educated on the fact that it is NOT ONLY the dealer’s responsibility but also the responsibility of EVERYONE who witnesses the hand to speak up if an error is made.

    For example if a dealer ships the pot toward the Q7 in your example unaware of the counterfeit on the turn ANY player should speak up THEN., not hands or hours later. And no one should be chastised for making things right. Like you said, CARDS SPEAK!

    Reply
    • November 16, 2014 at 11:09 am
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      Great point, but remember cards don’t speak until they are tabled. If they are still in the players hand no one should speak up. But yes, once they are on the table Everyone should speak up if an error is made

      Reply
  • December 12, 2014 at 9:37 am
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    How about telling someone you have a bigger hand than you do at showdown to see if they throw their hand in the muck. Then if they turn their hand over you can say just kidding I only have… An unethical angle to some but has worked for me a couple times against people who deserve it. I would never do it to an “innocent” player

    Reply
    • December 12, 2014 at 9:52 am
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      This is a pretty serious offense. If someone does it in our casino they are given a strict warning, it’s documented and if it happens again they are banned. As a dealer when someone calls out a hand I will not muck the opponents hand until the “claimed” hand is shown. That way their hand is still live just in case this guy was angle shooting.

      Reply

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